79.4 Friendship

 79.4 Friendship

 

Question:

            What is true friendship?

 

Answer:

True friendship keeps one away from the wrong path, guides in the

right direction, and, if necessary, shares the misfortune.                  (Couplet – 787)

 

அழிவி னவைநீக்கி ஆறுய்த்து அழிவின்கண்

அல்லல் உழப்பதாம் நட்பு.                                      (குறள் – 787)

Explanation:

Valluvar says that a true friend should even be ready to share the sufferings and misfortunes of his friend. One may think it is not practical to share the sufferings and misfortunes of a friend.  Valluvar’s ideas in Couplet 787 are not impractical. Historical references depict extraordinary friendship among two or more people helping one another and even sharing their misfortunes. For example, the Greek legend about Damon and Pythias is well known for true friendship, where one of them volunteers to sacrifice his life for the other.

Damon and Pythias were two intimate friends who were followers of the Greek philosopher Pythagoras. They traveled to the Syracuse area, which was ruled by the tyrant Dionysius. Damon and Pythias plotted to overthrow the tyrant Dionysius. Pythias was accused of plotting against the tyrant Dionysius. As punishment for his crime, Dionysius sentenced Pythias to death.

Pythias accepted the punishment but requested that he be allowed to travel home to see his aging mother and settle his affairs at home. Dionysius thought that if Pythias were let go, he would never return. So, he refused to grant Pythias’ request to go home. Damon offered to take his place while Pythias was gone. Dionysius agreed on the condition that, should Pythias not return when promised, Damon would be put to death in his place. Damon agreed, and Pythias was released.

Pythias did not return on the day he was supposed to, and Dionysius was preparing to execute Damon. But just as the executioner was about to kill Damon, Pythias returned. Pythias apologized to his friend for his delay and explained that the pirates captured him and threw him overboard, and he had to swim to the shore and come to Syracuse as quickly as possible. Dionysius was astonished by the friendship between Damon and Pythias, and he pardoned both. Based on this legend, true friendship between two people is called the “Damon and Pythias style friendship.”